morphia (notes)
The room filled with silent dogs, absolutely still, staring at me as i sit
in the chair. I kept the door open as some sort of offering or opening to
the outside world, an invitation, bring me your wisdom and set it before
me like so much opal and offal and pearl, but all that has arrived are the
unclaimed dogs of the neighborhood, collected mounds of trash beside the
boarded tenements so as to climb inside air ducts and feast on discarded
chunks of meat, dead squirrels, couch stuffing. Now they stare here, the
expanse of potential dominion, and all I can do is stare as I have abused
opium this afternoon and now want nothing but to stare, to fall into the
chair in microscopic steps. I know I need to get the dogs out, as the
compound is rife with delicate technology: decaying synths held together
with homemade patch cords and aleaoric possession, the basement beowulf
cluster grinding away, the fungal samples stored in the michael-jars
covering the walls of the closets back by the alley exit. I attempt
high-frequency ventriloquism, sending the dogs into the street, where they
pounce upon a carriage, and I find the cordless phone somewhere in the
folds of the chair, and i order a sandwich and beer and a dvd of
Performance from the delivery service, and this delivery boy seems to
appear instantly, and i warn him to shut the door, tell him to poison the
dogs, i will pay him in mutt pelts, and he stares at me until i attempt to
throw my now-cold tea in his face to shake him from his lethargy but
succeed only in spilling it on my bare feet. (lj
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(12:13.05.19.2005) [/ana] #