dead in the eyes
After ninety thousand dollars in plastic surgery, Katrina no longer
resembled her mother in any way. The graft and tuck and cut left her
carriage at different weights, so as to change her gait and measurements,
freeing her to rethink her choice of clothing, after post-operational
imprinting as to splints leading her towards tight-fitting dresses, later
leading to a fetish for corsets, a wasp-goddess variant on each seeming
definition of her genetic makeup. Katrina sold her home, her cars, and the
last of the land, rebuilding herself away from the open spaces of her
Savannah childhood into a cloistered hermitude similar in nature (but not
in detail, or in intent) to Saint Jerome. She set about filling the vast
gaps in her cultural memory, lining the walls of her dark apartment
(blackout curtains, 60 watt lamps) with the Western canon and various
detours (Imagist poets, Laotian pornographic manuals, Spinoza), whcih she
studied late into the morning, free of the chattering distractions of
telephone and television and visitors. She would leave, for short stints
in the world, and they would stare at her, awed and humbled, while she
bought milk and tea and carrots. No one would ever guess at what she once
was, Katrina thought, and smiled as she stepped out into the day.
(12:23.05.19.2005) [/scrytch] #