Fri, 14 Oct 2005

every day is evidence
“Hello?”

“Hello, is this Sarah?”

“Lucas? Is that you?”

“Yeah, it’s me, look I know you don’t want to get into a whole big thing but I just wanted to tell you I’m out of jail but I’m not coming back to town, I’m gonna stay with my folks for a while, I mean I cleaned up and it’s like if you can realize and find some peace when you’re in prison then maybe that’s something you can take out and put things back and so really I just wanted to say I’m sorry.”

“Okay.”

“Okay, huh?”

“I’m not really ready to have this conversation. It’s not even six am here.”

“Yeah, I know, but it’s been three years, I’m ready to get started.”

“You don’t say.”

“Yeah.”

“Well, that’s something.”

“Yeah, ha, something.”

“Right. So how did jail go?”

“It was bad. I mean, I can’t complain.”

“You can’t complain? What do you mean, you can’t complain?”

“It was jail or, whatever, I don’t know, something bad definitely, and it’s like you’re a toy that gets picked up and put back in the box and that gives you some time. That’s not a very good, the putting it isn’t right but you know.”

“I guess.”

“I don’t know what the deal with this bullshit weather is, tho. I nearly froze waiting for my folks to come get me.”

“So how are they with all this?”

“I think it’s okay, they seem okay, I got a plan and I think I can get work and I’m going to meetings and so long as I stay on track it’s okay.”

“Meetings?”

“You know. Meetings.”

“So you’re a different person now, huh.”

“I can see all this stuff I couldn’t see when I was with you. Not that it’s totally your fault.”

“Wait, wait.”

“What I mean is I know that I didn’t do right, and I want to do right now.”

“You know what you could do if you were serious about making things right.”

“You’re not still hung up on that money thing, are you?”

“You owe me two thousand dollars! That would be a big fucking step in the right direction as far as I’m concerned.”

“Look, you said it yourself, I’m a different person now.”

“You being a different person doesn’t mean you don’t still owe me two thousand dollars. You don’t just get to erase that because you got some new clothes and go to church.”

“This isn’t some kinda what the fuck thing like when I bought those turntables and told everybody I was a DJ. This is different. I’m all different now!”

“Didn’t your sponsor say you had to make right your prior mistakes? Isn’t owing me money a prior mistake?”

“One day at a time, bitch!”

“I’m gonna hang up now.”

“No, wait, look, the thing is, I was hoping you could help me with this thing.”

“Thing? You’re not seriously asking me for money, are you?”

“Sarah, look, okay, this will be the last time, it’s just. Hello?”
(00:24.10.14.2005) [/scrytch] #